Fun and Games
Walk to Rivendell
Malbeth the Seer
Sunday, 7 September 2003
To whom it may concern.
It seems that lately I've been losing my temper a lot. I lash out at friends
and family and then afterward I feel really bad about it. But everything
they do annoys me. What can I do to tame my temper?
Well, Megs, I remember a time when a particular fellow could bring out the temper in me faster than a pig eats acorns, as my Gaffer used to say. Seems I was always up about something those days. Part of it was the particular fellow, of course, so you might think about changing your surroundings, but another part was being so plumb tired out all the time. I blame the lack of good home-type foods. Elvish waybread is fair stuff, but it don't cure a hunger like a good coney and taters. So find yourself a mess of taters and maybe a good snort of pipeweed and ignore the slinkers and stinkers.
Dear Random Person Who Happens To Read This Letter, If It Is Even Read,
I was just wondering, why doesn't Pippin or Merry ever answer any
questions? Do you think they are incapable of answering questions? Or are they
merely on vacation? Or did you kidnap them and tie them up and hide them in your
broom closet? Let us all hope the last one did not happen.
A Wondering Person
Mr. Pippin and Mr. Merry are very busy gentlemen. The Thain of the Shire has a good many letters to write, as does the Master of Buckland, and yours must have been lost somewhere. You'd think they'd be more careful with such things by now. As to your other question, I can't say as I've ever seen either Mr. Pippin or Mr. Merry anywhere near a broom closet, though my old Gaffer's always said a spell of sweeping would do Mr. Pippin good, even if it might do less for the floor. Myself, I disagree; he did quite well at scouring the Shire, I thought. But, begging your pardon, I'm not at all certain what it was you meant to ask them. Whatever it was, it does seem odd that you'd prefer their answers to those of Mr. Frodo, who is nearly as wise as Gandalf, I'd say. Then again, I suppose you didn't want to trouble him with such things, which is very sensible of you, so you'll just have to be content with an answer from your humble servant,
Dear Grave Matters:
I recently met a really sweet guy, and I like him a lot, but the problem is
he lives all the way across the country. What's the best way to handle a
As my gaffer used to say, love's better kept as far as you can reach it. Of
course, I didn't need reach no further than Bywater, but it took what I
would call a long-distance trip for me to work up the nerve to approach my
sweetie. Though looking back at things, I'm not sure we'd have had the
chance for a serious relationship if I'd never come home. She'd have had
plenty of other lads seeking her attention, as I'm sure a young lass like
yourself has. And thinking more about it, I surely wouldn't have wanted her
to be straining to keep up with me when happiness was right there in town. I
sure am glad she waited, but if this fellow isn't coming to your Farthing
any time soon, I recommend looking locally for companionship.
Samwise Gamgee, Esq.
Dear Grave Matters,
I am wondering, is it possible to be too obssessed?
Arthien of Mirkwood
Master Frodo always says that a person ought to try and keep his head where it ought to be, facing ahead of him where he's going. As far as I wander though, that's where Master Frodo is.
See Questions from other weeks.
What is Grave Matters
and how do I get my
*DISCLAIMER: Middle-earth characters are fictional, as are the answers they might give in Grave Matters. The Barrow-Downs is not responsible for anything that happens as a result of following the suggestions found here.